Hello, friends. Usually, I am the one who answers all your questions, but today I have a question for those of you in college. Where do you get the motivation to complete assignments, pay attention in class, study for exams, etc?
Back in high school (Voldemort for some of you) the motivation felt clear. You build a resume, get good grades, interact with your teachers all so you can get into college--and so your parents won't beat your ass. However, I find myself questioning the point of anything in college. While the threat of getting my ass beat is still there (jk!), I'm lost the source of other forms of motivation.
What am I doing? Now, the answer you may have for me is to take a gap year or drop out, but that is not an option, 😬. So, for those like me who have to see this college thing through, what motivates you?
My current semester is pass/fail so I thought I could use this semester to feel college out and to experiment to see what works for me and what doesn't. While that has worked, I know myself as a college student a little better now, I think I've gotten a little too comfortable with it. I'm not gonna snitch on myself, but the student I was in high school would freak out (literal aneurism) if she saw the grades I was getting. The grades I have now are fine, I'm not failing but they definitely aren't the all A's I was getting and I am completely fine with that. THAT'S the problem; why aren't I freaking out more about this? My red flag is that I am not stressed beyond belief. However, a reason for that is because I refuse for that to be my life. Stress is not fun!! I do not want the stressed-out college student aesthetic (okay maybe a little, but not to the point where the stress is actually impacting my life lmao). Do not interpret this as I'm flunking out of college, I think I need to make that really clear. I am going to all my classes, turning in my work on time, completing all my work. I'm doing it all, I'm just not present for it. I feel like with one wrong slip all that would be gone because I don't have an anchor. I don't have something that I am actively working towards. For example, a lot of people have med or grad school. They need bomb grades to get into the next phase of higher education. I, however, have no intentions of going to grad school. At least not right after I graduate. I am actually so tired of schoolwork. I enjoy academia but maybe not the writing papers and graded assignments part, weird ik.
I recently wrote a composition in Spanish (that I actually have to rewrite and turn in again because I wrote in the wrong tense for the second half like a dumbass) about what my future life will look like in twenty years. I'm gonna upload it (in English and Spanish too for the bilingual girlies). It was so fun to write and really imagine what I want. I think I need to print out a version of it on really pretty paper and hang it up in front of my desk. That may be my anchor. I really feel like I can attain my future life, it's really nothing crazy, and I guess all the work I'm doing now is just in preparation for that.
I really wanna give my all to college I am just genuinely a lazy person and I am not ashamed of it. I really feel in my heart that life doesn't have to be hard or stressful for you to attain the future you want. But, I'm kinda getting proved wrong.
Writing this out kinda helped me refocus--(I say this but I'm still procrastinating on several assignments at the moment).
But yeah, this is really more directed at you guys. Maybe I could even make a post sharing whatever answers you guys have for other people to see so all of us kmworded. friends can help each other out?
You can either comment under the let me know what you think form down below, send me a message, or send it to the anonymous form linked in my bio. I really love you all so much, thank you for always listening and validating my feelings. I hope everyone enjoyed their extremely short Thanksgiving break.
For all my people lacking motivation I hope you find your anchor, I also hope you know how far you've come. If dropping out isn't an option for you (I'm like half-joking about the dropping out business), understand that so many people are so proud of you and you will get through this. Don't let this piece of paper stress you out!
If you are an adult reading this, everything is fine, I am fine, school is getting done 😃👍.
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