Over fall break a group of friends and I traveled to our friend’s family cabin. This was the first trip I’d ever taken with friends, and guys…wordies…I had so much fun.
Most of us reading this go to pretty intense schools where the stress never ends. For this break, I think we all really wanted to actually relax and detach ourselves from the world, and we did just that. As a city kid, nature, trees, the wilderness isn’t really an attention grabbing thing for me. I go to school in an arboretum (whatever the fuck that means), but basically there are really rare trees and plants everywhere. When I’m on campus, I walk around really unmoved by all of the nature. Maybe my attention is too clouded by stress? Who knows. But, a cabin in the middle of nowhere sounded kinda cool.
Bitch. The drive up was so beautiful, I think the fact that we went during the fall time and the foliage was out added to the beauty. It felt like a scene from a movie and even though I was taking pictures I just had to stop (more like was yelled at loll) to take in what I was seeing. The earth is so beautiful! You’d think that’d be obvious for me as an environmental studies major, but I honestly never partake with the naturey side of it too much. (Mostly humans and environmental racism,—you know, the fun stuff!)
I just wonder what would happen if more people had the ability to just be free in an open space. With no noise around, just land wind air and the people you love.
My friend and I kept saying, “look at how far we’ve come.” Like I said, I grew up in Brooklyn in an apartment building, the same apartment my whole life (which I think is a flex, idk). I’m privileged in the sense that I’ve traveled a bunch with my mom and with my school, so I realize how lucky I am to even leave the state. A lot of people in my neighborhood have never even left the block. However, the opportunity to be in open space in the wilderness is not something I’ve ever done before. It’s so simple, yet something so many people can’t do. I thought things like going camping or hiking was dumb because who wants to be around dirt and rocks, but once you actually see it for yourself you learn how euphoric it is. I have so much immense gratitude for the experience.
Once at the cabin, we went to dinner at the local brewery. I was partially scared because I assume anywhere in the county (non-city) is racist (even though I know the city is racist too, but 🤷🏾♀️)But the brewery was really nice and so were the people. After eating, we went to the field and played a game of frisbee together. And yes, I actually ran. The view was amazing, like a glance at that would give you the will to live.
Then we went back and the chefs (my two friends lol) whipped up some nice tacos. We sat around the table and what else do you do when you’re in the middle of nowhere with limited service and no tv? Talk. We sat around the kitchen table, all ten of us, and talked. It was so beautiful because here are all these people that I see everyday and all the time, but there’s still so much we don’t know about each other. This trip gave us rest, and beautiful views, but I feel like we gave each other so much. We went around the table and told each other what we admired about one another, and no one half-assed it. Like everyone said some really deep, really intuitive things about one another and it warmed my heart just how much we all see each other. It’s really rare to find a group of people who see you, your flaws, and your strengths—and who are patient with you.
I’ve also never been on a trip where no one got into an argument 😭 There was no drama, that’s actually the most surprising part to me.
The power went out for four hours lolzzz. BUT, we had a timeee! We unplugged from our devices and did presentations in the dark. Then, we made jewelry with/for each other as the sun went down. After that, we headed to a local diner that literally looked like a classic 80s diner. It was so trippy for me, I forget that some places in the country still haven’t been completely modernized and gentrified. It was cute.
This trip made me want to be still. I always seem to be on a journey of self discovery, but maybe I should just sit with myself and slowwww down. I aways wanna do everything fast, fast, fast, and I never take time to sit with the moment. When do I get to experience this new version of myself if I am worrying about the next change?
This trip taught me that it’s okay to put life on pause without isolating from everyone. You can have self-care and the people you love. Self-care does not equate to solitude all of the time. I can find peace in the people around me.
This trip also taught me that it’s okay to runaway. Do what you need to be happy and worry about the logistics later. I went back home for the last few days of break and I really fucking needed that. I wasn’t originally supposed to go home, but we were dropping off some other people in the city, and I missed my mom so much— this was the longest we had been apart. I said fuck it and hopped out the car in the middle of Harlem (while we were parked, admittedly) and went on home. I have never gotten on the train at 125st street and I looked like a fucking tourist with my bags— that was so embarrassing. I wasn’t going to go home originally because the train tickets back to school were expensive (I’m cheap idc) and I didn’t want to go if only for three days because that wouldn’t be enough time. But, everything worked itself out in the end. I’m really glad I went home. I thought I could make it until November, but I probably wouldn’t have.
To conclude, I am so grateful for my friends, I do not know if I can emphasize that enough. I worry about the future a lot, and if proximity to people is the only reason we talk. However, this trip reassured me that at this time moment in my life, the relationships and the people around me are real.
I’m allowed to be excited because I am safe and in good hands.
I truly needed this trip. I’m so fucking happy.
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